Social media can be a very tricky thing when it comes to dating.
On the one hand, using it can be a factor of what molded your relationship in the first place.
On the other hand, it could become the very thing that tears you apart.
What sort of dating advice should you get when it comes to social media?
Let me just go ahead and say that this is going to be an open discussion. There is no way that I could ever cover ALL of this topic with one video or vlog post. So for the introduction of this topic, I want to highlight some of the things that I personally experienced in my past relationships.
Not going to lie, I used to pressure my boyfriends to be “socially engaged” when it came to our relationship. I wanted the relationship statuses to change. I wanted frequently public posts to prove that he loved me. And I need to have the sweet and endearing birthday post every single year.
Now, of course, social media should not be dictating that much of your relationship. And the pressures to “show up” for social media while you’re in a relationship shouldn’t be as severe either.
In this video, I’ll share some dating advice to help you navigate your way into a TRUSTING relationship with social media!
Click below to enjoy this video!
How come he’s on Snapchat all the time?
How come you didn’t post anything on my birthday? Change your status to “in a relationship”!
👏🏼Let 👏🏼people 👏🏼know!
A lot of people fear two main things when it comes to social media and their relationship:
- they fear that they are using social media way too much instead of putting all the intention on you and the relationship.
- You’re afraid that people are going to slide into the DM’s or you’re afraid that somebody’s following your man and liking all his posts and then you got to go ahead and Facebook-stalk them to figure out who they are and put them in check.
You don’t really have to do that. If you dating the man that you trust 🤷🏻♀️(MESSAGE)!!!
If you’re having some questions about whether or not this is the actual relationship for you that I got a resource. It’s called, “#Relationshipgoals: 30 Ways To Tell If You’reDating The Right Guy” in the right season at the right time. So, go ahead and check that out. That way, we can just get rid of all those questions and we can figure this out without social media. You know, what you just go ahead and just nip it in the bud if this the right guy for you or not.
Here are some ways that you can actually make social media pretty engaging and fun and inviting when it comes to your relationship.
You have the classic sharing the memes, sharing the articles, you guys are sharing news left and right. Also, a lot of the times when your first dating, people will use social media, which is that first entryway of getting to know you from the jump. And they’ll actually be more comfortable talking to you there and connecting to you there than they actually are in person.
But when it comes to that trust issue, that DM issue, that “I got to check this girl who’s posting on your stuff” issue, there are some boundaries that perhaps you might want to set – Here are a few examples of that.
If you are feeling uncomfortable about certain individuals, who might perhaps be following your significant other or they’re following them, then you need to be upfront about it. Don’t be shady and just try to figure it out and handle it on your own through social media.
No, be a woman, and go to your man and talk to him about what you don’t like and ask him to kindly remove or unfollow. If he does the same thing for you than you have to at least have the respect to oblige and say okay too.
Because, at the end of the day, social media should not trump over your relationship. Your relationship should stand over social media.
You can’t control what people do when people choose to send messages to you or to your boyfriend to your husband or whoever. But you can control the BLOCK 🙅🏻♀️. You can control the DELETE 🙅🏻♀️. You can control that “this is not going to phase me and I’m not going to entertain the thought” mindset.
And another thing… while we are on the subject of DMs…
Don’t sit up in here and hold onto a DM and keep it for “just in case” you guys get into a fight or “just in case” things don’t work out. You’re not giving your boyfriend the loyalty that he deserves in the first place. So, you need to check yourself. What you need to do is you need to stop that from the jump.
You need to say that moving forward when it comes to social media, “I am a united front, I represent somebody besides myself and I’m going to show the world that what I do and what he does is in unison of our love that we put out here for the world to see.”
At the end of the day (I can’t stress this enough 🤦🏻♀️) at the end of the day, you need to TRUST him!
You need to TRUST yourself.
You need to TRUST God that this relationship is worth investing in, and being a part of, and therefore nothing is going to break it or get through to it regardless of what’s on social media.
I want to know how is social media with you and your Bae in your relationship? Is it a good thing? Do you see it as a crutch? Is it a bad thing? Let me know in the comments section.
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When it comes to helping Christian women navigate love, relationships, the single life and marriage while honoring God, no one does it better than Selina Almodovar (se-LEE-nah AWL-muh-DOH-varr). A renowned Christian relationship author, coach, blogger and speaker, Selina shows women how to LOVE BY FAITH by successfully transforming their love life through trust in God. 