Should you be entitled to get your guy’s passwords?
There are a lot of women out there who would read that last sentence and know exactly how to answer it!
“Yes, of course! We should hold nothing back from each other!”
“Absolutely not! Everyone is entitled to their own privacy!”
And to a certain extent, both responses are correct.
When I was dating and involved in long-term relationships, this topic really bothered me. At first, I was ok with it. But after dating someone for multiple years, I began to grow more interested in his phone.
I guess you can say that I also began to grow more insecure, having invested time with someone and yet still feeling like I wasn’t getting any closer to them.
Naturally, I assumed that getting access to their phones would equal totally letting their guard down. At the end of the day, all I wanted was for them to let their total guard down and let me in completely.
Having him give me his passwords was sort of the way to demonstrate that total and complete trust.
And of course, me being the aggressive woman that I was at the time, I would force this notion upon my Ex’s by initiating the trust exercise.
I would declare that my phone and passwords were totally free for him to have and look through. I lowered my guard in hopes that they would do the same.
Wrong. So very wrong.
Turns out that NONE OF MY EX’s gave me their passwords!
I’m sure you know what happened next.
Suddenly, my insecurity goes up, my trust for them breaks, and I am stuck in love with a man who refuses to let me in.
So now I’m spending the rest of that relationship trying to prove to him that I am worthy of letting into his innermost thoughts and secrets… aka who likes to text him at night and what’s really going on in his DM’s.
Sister, this is NOT the way to live your life. And it’s certainly NOT how you cultivate a strong relationship.
Now, is it wrong to even ask to have access to his passwords? NO. It’s not… when it’s at the right point of the relationship!
In this video, I break it down as to when, why, and how you can get access to your guy’s passwords!
Click below to enjoy this video!
So what do you think?
I will say this one last thing…
When I met my husband, we have very mature and ongoing conversations about trust, letting others in, and how to break walls down.
While the conversation of getting access to his passwords wasn’t a pivotal discussion in my mind, I’m sure that it wasn’t as awkward as the conversations I used to have with all my Ex’s. The reason why is because we weren’t afraid to talk about trust. And from those conversations, we weren’t afraid to grow and develop that trust.
So sister, if you’re out there and your guy isn’t going anywhere near this topic, it might be a red flag that you need to be aware of.