Can you really be friends with a childhood crush?
In most cases, your friend declared their love for you all throughout childhood…but you were both kids! None of it mattered, right?
Now that he’s all grown up, you may start to see things in him that you never saw before. And let’s be honest, he’s aging really well!
So, is the friendship completely shot now that your feelings have evolved? Should you forfeit all that you have with your friend now that you’re moving into your adult life??
Watch this episode below for my answer and advice!
The first thing you are going to want to do is to keep your distance!
Why is this step such an important first step?
Because he’s no longer “just a friend”. Now you gotta a crush on him. And we all know that how that goes. How you interact with a friend and how you interact with your crush are completely different!
Now you are starting to see your friend as a potential somebody. A potential somebody who could become a long-term somebody!
So before you go and do something or say something that could jeopardize your friendship altogether, you’re going to want to keep your space. At least until process and see what is really going on here.
Pinpoint exactly what it is that you’re now attracted to.
Is it his looks, personality, career, goals, or his smile??
What is it, after all these years, that you are now looking towards him in a romantic and loving manner?
These are the attributes that you are going to want to keep in mind. They’re all a part of knowing who you are and what you really want in your ideal relationship.
Next, you must strongly consider what you want to do from this point forward.
Do you want to keep this person as the friend you cherish, or do you want to explore the waters and see where this can go?
If you are certain that you want to take your friendship to the next level then you are allowed ONE opportunity to state your emotions.
Any attempts past one could take your friendship from “cool and comfortable” to “awkward and creepy”.
You really want to consider if this is something you want to bring up to your friend—remember, you only may get one chance.
If you do this, then make sure it’s genuine, honest, and of the heart. Your friend may know you better than any other guy out there so he’ll know when you’re trying to play games or beat around the bush on this subject.
Also, be prepared for if your friend decides to shoot you down.
If this happens, keep moving forward, no matter what.
However, if you still feel some kind of way towards him after voicing how you feel, then it may be best for you to keep your distance. Love your friend from a distance, through social media, and through mutually tied events, but do not go out of your way to reach out to him in order to get his attention.
Do not attempt to dig deeper into a place of trust, love, and intimacy with your friend if you got shot down. These things should be reserved for your significant other, not your friend.
If you’re feeling let down because your friend wants to remain friends (and friends only) then rest assured, there is still some good news!
You learned from this experience in a number of ways. First, you learned what you’re attracted to and what you’d like to have in a partner. Second, you learned that there is someone else out there who carries similar qualities who will definitely want the role of becoming your loving partner for a lasting relationship.
So hold on tight to your values. Life happens and the biggest takeaway from this entire experience is to embrace life. You were able to experience a love that was pure from childhood (and not many can say that!) Now you know a little more about yourself that will help you be prepared for when the right guy does come along.
Your turn: Do you have an experience with crushing on a childhood friend? How did it work out and what was your biggest takeaway from it? Share below in the comments!