When I was dating Kyle, and things were getting serious, I wanted to ensure that we did everything we could to guarantee and successful marriage. Including finding the best devotional for serious couples.
And to some, our study on love and relationships may have been too extreme, but for me, having lived through my parent’s divorce, and experiencing countless breakups of my own, I wasn’t taking any chances.
I think a lot of us out there actually do leave this major decision to chance. As if things will magically work themselves out if you haven’t gone through the tough times already.
Or, like some, you may have hit some bumps in the road and figured that if you can get through those then marriage shouldn’t be that hard.
Oh… I thought the same thing.
Then I was introduced to this book.
It basically changed everything. In a good way. A really, really good way. Best devotional hands down.
I can honestly say that if it were not for this couples devotional, then Kyle and I would have had some serious bugs to work out during our first few years of marriage.
But because of this book, and its timing, we went into our marriage fully confident that those bugs would never bother us then or in the future.
And can I just say that preparing for your future marriage should begin while you’re still dating! NOT when you’re already engaged. Because stuff can always surface and cause problems even when you’re that close to saying “I do”.
So dating is the key. And understanding where the direction of your relationship is going from the jump is going to help you save a ton of time, effort, and energy.
Alright, alright, what is the best devotional I keep talking about? Without further ado, this is it:
You know, I was going to mention a few devotionals that have really helped my husband and I get to the place you’re currently at (along with a few that others recommended), but I stopped myself. Because at the end of the day, NONE of them prepared us to move forward into the next phase of our relationship as well as this one did.
Why is this the best devotional out there?
This book was simple. Straight to the point. It didn’t have a whole lot of reading other than the questions. But those questions, man. They allowed us to cover EVERYTHING about ourselves, our future together, and everything in between.
And I’m not just talking about things to help you prepare for marriage. Or how to put God first in your relationship. I’m talking about stuff that you never thought to ask your partner, yet you’re super glad you did because it helped you learn so much about them.
I learned things about Kyle that would have never come up any other way. His past, his passions, his fears, and his most desired dreams.
I discovered what ticked him off, and what would keep him going if he ever felt like life was too much to handle.
Then, this book focuses on your relationship as a whole.
How to best communicate with each other. What to do when the other is facing difficulty or crisis. How to resolve a conflict. I mean, this book seriously covers it all!
When it came to actually prepare for marriage, the questions covered topics like spending (or saving money) and budgets, your expectations as a wife and your expectations in a husband. Which, by the way, were totally different answers between Kyle and me… so thank God for this discussion early on!
The book even covered future plans like kids, your ideal lifestyle, your marriage goals, and how you intend to spend the holidays as a married couple and once kids come into the picture. They have a question about adoption, pets, and taking care of your older relatives.
I cannot tell you enough how and why this is the best devotional out there.
Another great thing the book covers is how to stay connected to God at all stages of your relationship.
The questions challenge you in how to maintain a pure relationship and how to plan to put God first.
And it also covers every question you would (and should) have about sex. Whether it’s addressing your sex life in the future (and your expectations, how to keep things spicy, etc.) but it covers the deep questions you may have about your partner’s sexual past. Because, if you’re looking at marriage, you’d want to know everything– or at least, have that discussion and be open to talking about it if it’s necessary.
This book addresses how you intend to be held accountable during your dating stage, engagement, and marriage! Then, it gives you suggestions to help you stay accountable. Soo good!
How is this book laid out exactly?
So you have the questions. And underneath each question is an explanation (often paired with a Scripture) that helps explain why the question is so important to ask at this stage of your relationship.
Not gonna lie, some of these questions get very deep. And stretch you to go deeper than you should like. But that’s the good part.
That’s what makes this the best devotional out there– it genuinely exposes you to every angle you have to present to your boyfriend and vice versa.
Believe me, once you complete this entire book, you’ll know two things:
- Whether your boyfriend is a keeper and your future husband
- Whether you both are ready to take the next step in your relationship and get engaged
And if you’re unsure about either of those two things at the end of this devotional, then you’ll have 100% certainty that your relationship should end or you should seek to counsel before going any further.
I call this book the best devotional because, at the end of the day, every question leads to a conversation between you and your boyfriend. And throughout the entire conversation, Jesus is at the center of it all. It’s basically a practice that is allowing God to knit your hearts together with His time and time again until a solid foundation is established.
What’s the best way to complete this devotional?
So at first glance, “101 Questions to Ask Before You Get Engaged” may seem overwhelming. Especially if you already feel like you are pretty deep in your relationship and are anxious to move onward towards engagement.
The best way to do this book is to tackle no more than 1-2 questions per day.
As I mentioned before, some of these questions can get pretty deep, so you want to not only make time to discuss them with your boyfriend, but you also want to give them time to honestly address the question fully and wholeheartedly.
My husband and I completed the questions via email. I would write up the question of the day and send it to him. This gave us an entire workday to answer the question and send it to each other. We would answer questions on Monday-Friday and left the weekends open to discuss our answers or to catch up on questions we may have missed during the week.
Since we spoke to each other often, it was easy to talk about our answers also daily, but there were times when the discussion lasted a few days.
For example, the question about how to spend our holidays with family took about a solid week to come up with a compromise agreement. Which, by the way, we decided to alternate family houses (no more than two houses per holiday) between Thanksgiving and Christmas. So one year we’ll spend Thanksgiving with his family (not mine) then on Christmas we flip it and spend it with my family (not his). Sure, there was some backlash from family members “when we were dating”, but now that we’ve been married for almost five years, and have kids, everyone is hip to our holiday methods!
Because we only answered 1-2 questions a day, Monday-Friday, it took us about an entire season (4 months) to complete the entire book.
In that season, we grew more than ever before. We began the book after dating for about six months. So our relationship wasn’t brand new, but it wasn’t too long where an engagement was anticipated. It was the perfect sweet spot to dive into the best devotional that shaped us for a successful marriage!
Are you currently dating someone? Would you like to know if things should get serious or not? Do you think you know and love them enough to marry them?
Then I totally recommend you get this book!! It will not disappoint!